herumtreiber

Title: DOMS attack
Author:

herumtreiber
Characters: Draco/Harry, Hermione
Word count: ~620
Rating: R
Warnings: Humour, suggestion, ominous picture
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or related characters. Nor do I make any money from writing these stories
Summary: Draco is startled by what he finds in his favourite webpage
Notes: Inspired by the recent happenings.

Draco clicked on the link, pressing the touchpad of his magical laptop. He was ready to upload his recounting of what transpired last night between Harry and him to his blog, specifically the tomdan section.

However, instead of the Hogwarts picture he expected, a monster seemed to leap at him. Startled, the blond nearly fell off his chair. His grey eyes widening in disbelief, he muttered, "Varnish error 503, service unavailable…. By Merlin, it's just as Harry told me!"

The blond took out his wand with shaky fingers, ready to defend himself from the unspeakable menace Harry mentioned. He jumped in the air when he heard the doorbell to their apartment.

After he opened the door, he scowled at Hermione.

"Malfoy, is Harry here?"

Draco held her by the arm and nudged her inside, closing the door rapidly. "Don't just stand there, Granger, the doms might get you!"

She frowned at the scared blond. "Doms, what are you on about?"

He pointed at the laptop on the table. "See that?"

Hermione walked to the machine and sat down, studying intently the cryptic message. Finally she turned to Draco, rolling her eyes. "That's Joe, the hippo. They put it on screen when--"

oOoOo

"The doms attack!" said Draco with a trembling voice. He put his wand on the pocket of his Armani jacket, sauntering with unsteady feet towards the brunette witch. "After we went to that BDSM club in London… "

He trailed off, mumbling to himself, "Harry is not satisfied when I tie him to the bed and stuff him full of dildos and then fis--"

Hermione lifted her hands imploringly. "Please, Malfoy! I've no desire to listen to your perversions. It's enough that I read them in your blog!"

Draco eyed suspiciously the witch. "How did you find it?"

She snorted. "A little Google goes a long way. You should've used another nom de plume. Smirking serpent was a dead giveaway." She crossed her arms and then refreshed the page. It didn't work, Joe the hippogriff kept glaring at her. Sighing, she said wearily, "What did Harry tell you?"

"He said that when that animal appears, the 'Doms attack'. That means the dominants of the clubs wreak havoc on wizards. They go and spank them and chain them and…"

He stopped when Hermione guffawed loudly. This continued for a while until Draco snapped. "Do you think it's funny, Granger?"

Taking a deep breath, she said between snickers, "You… believe Harry. This is a… DOMS attack!"

He rolled his eyes. "Just like Harry said!"

"No, Draco. It's a Denial Of Magical Service attack." She pointed to the screen. "That varnish 503 error? It means the wandmakers refuse to employ the correct varnish on the wands they use to spell the magical servers."

Whilst Draco tapped with his shoe against the wooden floor, Hermione muttered, "They are on strike, I don't know why." Staring intently at the Slytherin, she continued, "You should know. You worked on the potion they use to varnish their wands!"

"But Harry said--"

"Harry likes to prank, you should know. With the twins' example, and the Marauders… he's liable to joke."

At that moment a small silver shape darted through the wall. The terrier Patronus delivered Ron's frantic message. "Mione, you've got to save me! Blimey, the dominas will attack soon! They've already put their bloody hippogriff on the webpage. Harry told me…."

oOoOo

Harry opened the door to their apartment and walked inside. However he was attacked by flying chains which wrapped around his wrists and ankles. He was levitated to the bed by his smirking boyfriend.

"What's the meaning of this, Malfoy?"

The blond angrily stabbed his wand at Harry, vanishing his clothes. "This, my dear Potter, is a true Dom attack!"

DOMS attack - part 2